“Forgiveness God’s Way”

Scripture: Matthew 18:23-35

When I was active in prison ministry, I discovered one of the great, and generally unspoken, secrets of men who have been found guilty of committing a crime, and it revolves around the issue of forgiveness. Many will come to the understanding of why they need to forgive those who have wronged them – their abusive parents, an unfaithful wife, a deceitful friend, their inept public defender, an opinionated judge. They understand the need to seek forgiveness from their victims. But the hardest thing for most is the vital need to first forgive God (He didn't stop them from committing the crime!) and then to forgive themselves for having inflicted so much pain on strangers and loved ones alike.

The Kairos weekend focuses on many aspects of faith growth, but “forgiveness” is emphasized the most during 3 separate experiences spread out over the 4 days. And most of the men who attend will eventually accept the need to both forgive themselves, and to accept the forgiveness that will begin their healing.

Read Matthew 18:21-22

These verses bring us to the basic truth of forgiveness – that it isn’t ritualistic in nature, but rather must be heartfelt. Peter knew that the law said he must forgive 3 times, but he wanted Jesus to think that he had grown beyond the law. But even though he increased the count, he still wanted to keep count, to know that there was a limit to forgiveness, to keep forgiveness within his own control.
But Jesus lets him know, in no uncertain terms, that forgiveness must be centered in God’s heart, not within the human mind. “No Peter, not even a perfect 7 times. Forgive him My way.” What kind of forgiveness forgives only up to a point, and not a step further? The answer is that it is no forgiveness at all. What kind of forgiveness will expect forgiveness for the big things, but not for the routine things of failure in our daily life? Only a poor and completely inadequate forgiveness would do that.

In the 19th century there was a whole genre of Wild West stories. One of them was about an old cattle rancher who discovered that a young cowhand had been caught in the act of rustling a cow. When the thief was dragged before the rancher, he looked down at the frightened youth and said, “Hang him. Nothing personal, son. I like you a lot, you understand. But we have rules here in the West. Besides, it will teach you a lesson.”
One day, years later, the old rancher dies and appears before the judgment seat of God. As he stands there, he remembers all the mean, horrible things he had done on Earth. He particularly recalled hanging that young cowboy he liked so much -- and he trembled in his boots. Whereupon, the Lord God of heaven looked down upon him in mercy and tenderness and said, “I forgive you. It will teach you a lesson.”

Of course this is only a story, but it teaches us a valuable lesson. And the lesson is this - our way isn’t even close to God’s way! Amen?

Read Matthew 18:23-27

This is one more example of what we can expect in heaven. The servant has not been faithful in his managing of the master’s estate. But the amount that is owed goes far beyond all conscious thought – it is about 10 times greater than the annual tax income for all of Herod the Great’s territories. It would have been in the multi-millions of dollars, and no servant could ever owe that much money to his master. Having an appreciation for a debt of 10,000 talents in Jesus’ day is like our understanding of what a $13 trillion debt means for us! It’s just a very, very, VERY large number that boggles our mind, but we know that it’s a lot more than we’ll ever have or can ever repay!
This servant certainly deserves to be punished for incurring such a huge debt for his master, and, quite honestly, could never in a million years be able to repay it. His only hope was to seek forgiveness for his failure, and to ask for time to repay the money. But the master knows full well that the money can never be repaid, and decides that his only course of action would be to forgive the debt outright.
The servant admits the wrong that he did, and asks for a chance to make it right, but how does the King respond? He forgives the debt that the servant could never repay anyway.

The people of the world would certainly question the sanity of this story. Who in their right mind would ever forgive the repayment of millions, maybe even billions, of dollars? And anyone who mismanages an estate to this degree deserves to spend the rest of their life in prison. And quite honestly, I doubt that any normal person on earth would or could act like this marvelous King.
But then, as we have seen over the past several weeks here, the parables that Jesus told are never about the world – they are about our God and His capacity to be God for us. The truth is that our God isn’t normal – at least by earthly standards! Hallelujah! He is driven by mercy, not condemnation. John 3:17 – “For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through Him.” We deserve the most intense punishment that even God could devise, but He would greatly prefer that we throw ourselves on His everlasting love and mercy. The king in the parable is so vastly rich that even 10,000 talents can be forgiven. Our heavenly Father is so wealthy in goodness that He can forgive the most heinous sins that we can ever commit. And He has the capacity to go on forgiving 70 times 7.
And how do people respond to the Lord’s “infinite goodness”?

Read Matthew 18:28-31

Yep – you guessed it! God’s forgiveness for our sin is a wonderful thing to behold, but our forgiveness of the pain that others heap on us may not be so forthcoming! Human nature likes to keep things in balance – let the punishment fit the crime, a little remorse for a little sin, “I can forgive, but I’ll never forget!”.
Get the picture? We don’t want to forgive too much or too quickly. But how can we possibly think that our glorious Father in heaven doesn’t know what we’re up to? - That we aren’t forgiving like He has forgiven us? That we’re forgiving with our minds instead of with our hearts? That our forgiveness has limits? That we’re still stuck on Peter’s 7 times, instead of Jesus’ 70 times 7?

Read Matthew 18:32-35

We will be held to account for not only our own sinful ways, but also for the ways we treat the sinfulness that others show to us. We want God to show us His mercy and forgiveness, but do we show that same level of love to others? When in doubt, forgive, and then, just to be sure, forgive some more.

A short mnemonic.
When you stand at the Pearly Gates,
would you rather be told you believed too much or you believed too little?
would you rather be told you cared too much or you cared too little?
would you rather be told you tried too hard or you didn't try hard enough?
would you rather be told you were too forgiving or you were too judgmental?
would you rather be told, Well done, thou hyper-hopeful and risk-taking servant, or Well done, thou sober and play-it-safe servant?
- Homiletics Online.

A couple of weeks ago, I challenged us all to be more willing to take a risk for Jesus! But we will never take that risk if we let our minds rule our actions. We need to lead with our hearts. That last verse tells us “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from ..” – where? Our mind? No! “From your heart.”
Jesus is the life line that the Lord God Almighty has given to each of us, and unless we grab on and hold real tight, we will never be able to live as He lives, to love as He loves, to forgive as He forgives.

Praise the Lord, that His love for the likes of us isn’t a balancing act, ensuring that we receive just what we deserve – no more and no less. I don’t know about you, but when I commit a 6” sin, I want His forgiveness to extend beyond the horizon! And I need to show that same “horizon” love to others.

Praise the Lord!